


A World Alone

by Andrea250



Category: ONE OK ROCK
Genre: Fuckbuddies, M/M, Silent confessions, Unrequited Love?, broken Toruka, idiot in love, not much dialogue, oblivious Toru, pathetic Taka, silent heartbreak
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-03
Updated: 2020-10-03
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:55:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26789308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andrea250/pseuds/Andrea250
Summary: He made a choice, and now he must lay in this grave, he calls a bed...
Relationships: Morita Takahiro/Yamashita Toru
Kudos: 7





	A World Alone

**Author's Note:**

> I have made another short one but longer than the last one. I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> Note OOR does not belong to me, Toru and Taka are living and breathing human beings, this is just a work of fiction and nothing more. Even if I wish Toruka is real, this just for fun, and I find them so cute together.
> 
> Please enjoy!

  
  
  
**_ Song: A World Alone- LORDE _ **

  
  
**_ 3rd Person's P.O.V _ **

"I love you." Those three words dancing on the tip of his tongue.

He caresses the man's tired features, as his chest rises and falls, with every minute passes in the silence of the aching night. Taka is left with those silly thoughts floating freely in the back of his mind without a care. Without no one listening to him, he is thankful the younger is riddled with sleep and not among the living as he holds his secret in a clenched fist. And fake laughter as their friends earlier comments on how close they are.

While Toru, cheeks tinted cherry red and profusely denying their joking accusations as though it is something to be ashamed of. Taka follows similar action, yet, inside, he is falling as the seams of fantasy are torn apart and resown with reality. It is a reminder that no matter what, Moriuchi Takahiro would never have Yamashita Toru's heart. He covers his crest-fallen smile with the pint glass of some foreign beer that rushes down his throat in one swig his lungs could take the pressure, and all their friends just whoop and cheer as he downs the content.

This is a drunk mistake, the bed and naked bodies, he shouldn't have kissed the blonde back. Nor should he have let the guitarist so intimately devour him with every thrust and moan his mind is set ablaze with their dirty actions.

They are not together, never will be, he won't ever be his boyfriend, or get to be anything more than fuck buddies. People with time and needs, it is easier this way, to share a bed, it is less of a hassle and no scandal could get out if they just fucked around less of a mess and no one would know, it is perfect!

He promised not to allow Toru to use him again. This will end badly, it always does, and Taka never seems to learn that lesson he never will. He will always fall for the man that gave him something to live for, gave him hope, brought life back into his lungs, and made him the man he is today. He can hold his head high with pride and victory rather than uncertainty and shame. Taka owed the man his life and more.

Sometimes he wondered if his infatuation is admiration disguised as love? It always crossed his mind when he thought of the leader in a more intimate-less friendly manner, and a part of him wishes that his heart could tink before acting so recklessly. He made a choice, and now he must lay in this grave, he calls a bed, no one will mourn for him. Now he wouldn't let anyone give him kicked puppy stares or their half-ass condolences; he didn't need them!

Instead, as the sun does, he too will love the moon in silence and from afar. He only wanted was Toru to call his name and to smile at him with the same tenderness and fondness he uses to greet him in their youth. Now the guitarist is older, and there are new freckles and scars, there is a different alluring aura, and his demeanor is shifted.

He might have known him for more than a decade, but this world is ever-changing, and so are people. He may get things wrong and behave without thought, but the blonde never shut him out. Not like this? Why is it so hard to get into contact when he is sleeping next to him almost every night when they are coming down from the high of the fast lane life!

He didn't want to be another mistake to regret in the morning, he swallows his shame for breakfast and throws up his pride every time after. He never allows himself to forget that he is just another warm body. He is the afterthought to the long and aching days the leader suffers through, but he doesn't mind even when his heart hurts so good because Yamashita Toru is the one.

How could he not?

"I love you," he whispers those forbidden words again into the mid-July breeze forgetting how to breathe.

He watches the younger turn away from his touch, yet he doesn't mind the sting of rejection. It is another Tuesday night, he wore his desperation like a second skin when no one is watching.

They are a train wreck, as he watches the tracks that lead to him set ablaze by unrequited love, it burns the brightest in the coldest of nights. When he can see beyond the glamour and rose gold lenses of love, and silly ideations of a possible yesterday, it peaks. Taka knows never to bite more than he could chew. But he never learned how to listen, yet he took the risk and fallen without notice of the dangers that lay beneath him.

He risked it all for Yamashita Toru!

Yet, he knew the other could never give him that same respect as he is nothing more than his vocalist, best friend, and fuck buddy, not his lover. With each stab of action, he didn't realize that Toru is slowly killing him. The person he loves is slowly killing him! It is clear as the dawn that if he kept loving him, he would not survive.

His lung's aching for release as he coughs up the prettiest peach color petals and Scarlette red substance into the palms of his hands for the fourth time today. He felt the piercing dread reach further into his chest and wrapping around his throat. It begins to suffocate him, just like the love he feels for him.

He would die loving Toru.

 _'I love you!'_ His breath stutters into folds of silent prayers as he could not utter those words without feeling the pleasure in the pain.

That will be his undoing! He runs his dainty fingers through his bleach blonde hair, as the anxiety swallows him deeper into the sea of misery, his misery! As he stares at the sleeping male, he brings the four petals into view. He wonders how something so innocent and pure could become rotten and deadly?

He discards them on the hotel bedside table and swallows his shame. Taka turns back to his killer, his smile despondent as Toru unconsciously pulls him into his naked chest. Skin flushed, and his cheeks dusted baby pink as he wishes that the younger would mean it.

 _'I love you.'_ He draws in a shaky breath and hopes to god the pain that flutters like butterfly wings in his chest will subdue but, it never does.

He swallows the guilt and pain, as he does not wish to disturb the man that holds him close. He steals a glance at the male's softened features of the blonde. He soaks in every wrinkle and imperfection. Instead, he counts sheep to take him to their motherland of Japan.

He feels homesick somedays, and especially this night, he masks his pain with excuses and calls it a night.

"I love you." He hears those words leave Toru lungs but, he drowns out the noise, not wanting to know whose name belongs at the end of that sentence, which ex-lover does those words belong to? Whose heart does Yamishta Toru long for? Because he knows that it will never be him and so he takes it to the skies and dreams of being the answer but knows he does not fit into the man's equation, sometimes it is better to play pretend.

It is healing for the soul to not know the extent of the trauma, and so he allows sleep to bring him peace to the chaos he surrounds himself.

 _'I love you.'_ He would go through the pain for a moment in the sun.

**_ -The End _ **

**Author's Note:**

> If you have made it up to here, thank you, brave soul, I hope you enjoyed the read and I will continue to do better with each story I release. If you have any criticism please do give, I always welcome it as I want to do better and make content others will want to enjoy reading. Again thank you and please look forward to my next work. 
> 
> -AndreaXx


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